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Friday, December 21, 2012

12-21-12: The Mayan Apocalypse

Honestly, the only way I could experience the Mayan Apocalypse would be if I went to Taco Bell and had too much to eat. 

To be fair, the last guy proclaiming the end of the world was much worse: a Christian, who caused a lot of followers to empty out their bank accounts. The people at fault now are an ancient race of Meso-American natives who ran out of room on their stone calendar. They didnt' have the Bible, either. It's a bit easier to let them off the hook.

A lot of effort was put out this year on websites, in books, and on television to increase the apocalyptic hype. People are transfixed by the end of the world, so transfixed that some even miss the point of being on earth: living. 

Don't get me wrong. I'm fascinated by prophecy and the end times, just like any other Christian fanatic, but I wouldn't stake my bank account on it. I enjoy speculating, but I know it's really just speculation until I see for myself the Glorious Appearing.

For me (and for everyone else on earth) the end of the world will certainly come whenever each one of us dies, which could be today, come to think of it. Everyone will face their Creator, even if it isn't because an asteroid wiped us all away to Kingdom Come. So, before I get to dying, I better get to living, because when the end does come (via mac truck, gun shot, or Mayan Apocalypse) I can be confident I've lived a good life and honored God with my breathing.

This Christmas season, let's think about those things, rather than thinking about everyone rotting away under massive plagues, suffering for months until they die a lingering, solitary death devoid of all hope and meaning. 

Stop fantasizing about everybody dying and start buying presents!

In the words of my favorite online comic, Natalie Dee:

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